These damn coins. As a bartender I can't count how many times I've given someone the side eye thinking they only left me a quarter. After leaving it on the bar for a good 30 minutes (proving my disinterest in such a measly donation) I will sweep it up to possibly pelt it in the direction of the jerk to find out Ms. Sacagawea has done it once again. Her, the MTA and the post office are trying to bring out the bitch in me.
After working all week and weekend I am headed to Rockaway Beach with friends tomorrow! I hear they have huge waves. So with a little R & R we will need some cocktails. Here are a few perfect ones for the beach....
BLUEBERRY LEMONADE
Stoli Blueberry Vodka
Lemonade
*Mix your own at home or just bring some vodka in a water botttle (it's clear) and they always sell lemonade at the beach
TEQUILA ADE
Tequila
Yellow Gatorade
*simple to mix. simple to hide. And don't worry about this
THE SHOTGUN
Cheap ass beer
A Key
Hold unopened beer on side with mouth facing up.
Take a key and stab the beer as close to the bottom of can as possible and tearing a hole ( not with fingers-ouchey) at least as big as a quarter (or sacagawea)
Wait till everyone has cut their hole then cheers, open up top and guzzle beer from the hole as fast as you can. Loser has to buy more beer.
I was gonna put a link to some shotgun videos but sorting through them just made feel like white trash for even posting this. If you're looking for a classy drink the shotgun is not your thing.
Yellow Gatorade! That's the culprit!!! i mean, i uh, i drink Orange Gatorade...
ReplyDeleteLove the use of links on this post. Funny stuff. That wave was killer. And some Mercy teacher actually put one of those coins in my hands as i was walking into the cafeteria in May and said "I need a bill" and just shoved the coin in my palm. for a second i was like "wtf lady" but i had to see where this was going so i gave her a buck. Sadly she went over to the vending machine, i was hoping for a better plot twist. but as a an added bonus i watched the machine spit out my crinkly dollar a few times.
I used to hate those coins back when I was working as a cashier at Stop & Shop. I usually just ended up throwing them in with the quarters causing my register to never add up correctly at the end of the day. Still better then the customers who pay in pennies and coupons tho...
ReplyDeleteIt's funny how you can come up with the stupidest questions like what lemon gatorade does, when you got so much time on your hands. Funny though; hey follow me at simplifyingcspan.blogspot.com
ReplyDelete